Polite Indifference

It is not always the absence of love
that makes me seem alone,
often it's been too much love
given to me by the wrong people
for the wrong reasons
that keeps me here,
gladly alone,
rather than have the life sucked
out of me by the violent needs
of other minds and bodies
that does not mean
that I'm not grateful...
but I am sad
not to be able to put my arms
around those who truly loved me
and give them something more
than polite indifference.
Oh, how I tried.
I think they should know
I tried...
and I choose to be alone
rather than wrapped in arms
I could never need.

12021976