End of February

The moon lit up the sky last night and there proved to be no storm forthcoming. The stars glittered and winked as if sharing a small joke with me and I smiled in return. Today has arrived with clear deep blue skies, a lack of clouds, and grateful birds chattering and singing of their own joy.

I caught the squirrels raiding not only the bird feeder on the front deck, but the one hanging in the tree as well. Formerly they left this one alone, but once they learn how to grab and tilt one, none of the rest are safe except the feeder hanging from the eaves they haven't been able to breach.

It's hard to believe this is the end of February already. I have been so busy keeping winter at bay, shoveling snow, feeding the hungry birds and squirrels, and working around the house that is has come and gone with a winter roar, and yet barely a whisper.

Tomorrow we will see March in, will it start like a lion or a lamb? I plan on letting nature show me more of the wonders that God has created.

02282001

You of the heart

You were born
you of the heart
before all thought
or words formed
understood deeply
enveloped in love

04171991

Something's wrong

I can't put my finger on it

My world obscured by clouds

Something's wrong I know

How many lost days I forget 

A stranger lost in a crowd

This is how my days now go

11570216

Until there's no me

Look for who you are
you've left yourself
laying about somewhere
this discomfort grows
as does my lostness
my disease of perplexity
ever expanding
taking me away
until there's no me
left to look for

04171991

Disassembled

The world's fragmented
there's no remembering
gone like broken glass
days scattered around
refracted colors everywhere
I'm disassembled now

04161991

Embrace the many

Embrace the many
become whole
completed in love
on an infinite journey
to nourish the soul
and join the lord above

04161991

Eternity comes to be

A center of light
that's who you are
that's all there is
let the light expand
let the void be filled
the emptiness gone
as one's self grows
eternity comes to be

04151991

Not equipped

Me, kind and gentle
has given way to fits
and violent outbursts
fueled by my rage
ending in tears
oh, so much lost
in my last few years
the forgetting hurts
the world so strange
nothing is the same
days hard to handle
when nothing is clear
for this I'm not equipped

12420216

Of this life

You're not here
running useless errands
suffering at the whims of others
there's a greater power
you're here for a better purpose
to know love from within
completing the circumstance
of this life

04131991

At one

Love creates, it heals
infinitely, touched, touching
always fresh, always becoming
at one, at peace, is how it feels

04131991

In control

Every person and every living thing has at its life's center God's perfect control. I will not judge by appearances. I will not fear when things do not go my way. No matter what it may look like, I must remember, God is always in complete and perfect control.

06051991

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is so hard for us to accomplish, at times, because we do not want to let go of being a victim, of holding a grudge, of being right, of recognizing the fear in the situation. When we hold on to all these things we are acting in fear ourselves; of letting go, of releasing, of the uncertainty of the outcome.

When we put it in God's hands the outcome will always be for the highest good, we ourselves will be at peace, the mind's chaos will be quieted and we will have silenced the fear with forgiveness and trust in God. It is an illumination of the spirit. Fear is a product of the ego. It has no place in our spiritual life.

It is futile anyway, for we are not in control of life's events, only our reactions to them. Forgiveness is a form of emotional release. It's between you and God. Once you evaluate the truth of the situation it is easier to forgive.

We get so caught up in the process of life we forget that these are petty issues in the greater universal process of life itself. Forgiveness makes room for divine blessings in abundance and expands our mind and spirit.

There are spiritual laws of the divine that benefit us, and what we believe is reflected back to us. If we believe we can influence our environment with a positive attitude, a loving outlook, a sense of peacefulness and order then that is what we will create in our life.

If we can forgive ourselves for our negative reaction, we can forgive others for their chaos that caused it. For we always have a choice of how we choose to respond. God, in His wisdom, gave us that power.

Innocence is visible, we do not need to defend ourselves, just be willing to forgive the misjudgement of others.

11071997

Entrenched

Entrenched in torment
fear disguised as resistance
I sit in unwillingness
to move on, to forget
torn, barely conscious
this lost love begets

11091995

The end of day

Tonight the sky is clear and the stars are out to play. The temperature has dropped and the remainder of snow after clearing all the decks crunches under my boots. The snow was steady all day, sometimes hardy soft flakes and at other times smaller pez pellets.

The cats got their private animal show and there was so much activity to watch I had to pull up the blinds on even the front windows and I joined in watching and filled the space with my laughter. Nature such a marvel to behold from dawn until dusk and beyond. I feel totally blessed to be surrounded by God's creation.

02102001

Pure Joy

Where the heart leads
the truth must be lived
compassion and love
let us know pure joy

11241995

Forgive me

I now forgive myself for every thought, word, and deed I have embraced or undertaken that has kept me from the realization of the truth about myself, and the perfect unfolding of the divine plan for my life.

06131991

Oneness

Give me oneness
connected with
all-that-is
where the world
is not such
a serious place
and the spirit
is free

11161995

Pain and Suffering

Pain is not truth
suffering not reality
they transform us
and we remember
love and joy
and the freedom
they bring us

12111995

Explore Love

Explore love
it's the vast unknown
a  territory with no map
a miracle of oneness
and bonding of many
to be honored daily
for the blessing it is

11021995

No In-between

When is it time to leave a relationship? When you don't love anymore! And how do you know that? When you are in oneness with all, does it not seem there is never a time you don't love? Oh, love completely, or love not at all. That is how the heart functions and the soul is nourished. There is no in-between. When you don't love, there is no reason to stay... and that's your sign to go.

11021995

Made Whole

You find opportunities
throughout many lives
to reach equilibrium
then you'll know
that you are both
spirit and human
mind and heart
love and fear
one and many
together and apart
separate pieces
made whole

04111991

Don't withhold

God has always forgiven me
I can forgive myself if I try
to forgive is to be free
being angry causes hurt
for it withholds
leaving me wanting
what I withhold from another
will be withheld from me
and that's haunting

06141991

Sparks

Love sparks the fires of passion. Passion leads to spontaneity and creativity. Spontaneous creativity is a supreme act of trust. When you trust yourself and the universe enough to give yourself over to the passion of what you love, you are serving humanity and the Divine.

06171991

Can't be bought

Most of my life I thought I wanted money. I believed if I had money to do what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it, I would be deliriously happy and free. It took a while, but I realized it was not the money that I actually wanted. My true desire was for the freedom I thought the money would bring.

If you are not totally free, ask yourself why. Because we paint ourselves into boxes that determine what we will allow ourselves to do based on our race, gender, age, and the external expectations that we believe those boxes impart.

Do we choose for ourselves that which we truly desire? We do not. We allow labels and expectations to keep us in our boxes, then we cry for freedom. The entire purpose of life is to be free, exercise our free will, and choose how to enjoy our freedom.

Yet, we spend most of our lives doing things and acquiring that that keep us in mental, physical, and emotional bondage. Freedom is a state of mind. It is the outgrowth of our willingness to make conscious choices of our own free will, to live through the consequences of our choices without blame, shame, or guilt. To grow in spirit.

Freedom is a sign of self-awareness and self-respect. When you are aware of what it takes to maintain your mental, emotional, and physical well-being, and you make conscious choices towards that goal, you are exercising your freedom.

Freedom is the recognition of the truth. The truth is that the genes of the One who created the universe are at the core of our being. You are powerful, you are unlimited, you are the reflection of creative genius.

When you realize this truth and accept it you know that you are free to choose whatever you believe to be the truest reflection of your identity. Freedom requires constant acts of courage. You must be courages to admit that all things are possible and that you are equipped to handle them.

When you are willing to demonstrate this degree of courage and take a risk knowing that, whatever happens, you will land in the exact place where you should, you become totally and unequivocally free.

Freedom is a state of mind! What you believe, how you feel, what you do, how you respond to any given circumstance at any given time is the only impediment to freedom. You are always free to choose how you will respond. You are always free to choose what you will do and not do.

You are always free to try something new, to take a risk, to challenge the status quo, and to change your mind. That is what freedom is about. It is not your bank account or level of education. Those things may help you experience a greater freedom of movement and accomplishment. They do not determine whether you are free or not.

Are you courageous enough to live the truth of your desires without fear? This is what will determine your freedom. Once you decide what you want and whether you are willing to do what it takes to get it, you are free to follow your dreams.

More important, once you are clear about the experience you want to have, you are free to make the choices that will result in your having that experience.

It order to be free you must be clear about exactly what it is you want and be open to any and all possible means of acquiring what you want. Given it is righteous and good.

I discovered evidence of conflict in my search to be free. I think this is true for most of us. The things we think will give us freedom will actually keep us in bondage.

I wanted things I thought would make me feel better about myself. I was mature enough to examine and peel away any behavior, attitude, or belief that was limiting or restrictive. Though I was still struggling.

It was then that I took off my people-pleasing cape. I found freedom about that same time that I developed the courage and the presence of mind to say no without feeling guilty.

The immediate outgrowth of my newfound freedom was the ability to ask for what I wanted. This was enhanced by the willingness to ask someone else if the first person said no. My sense of personal freedom increased at the same pace as my willingness to do what felt right to me, even when people said I was crazy.

My freedom also kept pace with my willingness to face the things I feared most. If you can admit you are afraid and keep moving, you will be released from the fear. Freedom from guilt, false responsibilities, and the need to be legitimized by others opens your mind to new choices, new opportunities, and amazing possibilities.

When I realized that God, the divine source of life, not people, was the source and substance of all good things, I was freed from every "isim" that held me captive.

I discovered freedom as an inherent part of my life the day I stopped telling God what I wanted and asked how I could be of service to God. Shortly thereafter, the guidance came, the self-trust deepened, and the gates of my mental, emotional, and spiritual prison flew open.

There is something very freeing about knowing that God believes in you. God's grace is freedom. God's perfect and divine plan for my life will set me free. Freedom is my divine birthright. Freedom is a state of mind. I am always free to choose. My free will is the foundation of my freedom. I am free to ask for what I want. Freedom is an experience that money cannot buy.

04111991

Be still

Simply be still and know the power within.
Simply be still and know the presence of Him.
This stillness will bring you peace.
This stillness will put your mind at ease.
Let the stillness nourish your soul.
Let the stillness make you whole.

10261995

Invisible Power

Invisible is the power
of the divine, and yet
its energy keeps order
shaping the environment

10241995

Kissed with sunlight

The snow is alternating with rain, and turning to slush on the ground and melting off the driveway even though the air is quite frigid and requires gloves and hat outdoors. No need to shovel under these conditions and the snow plow has been making regular runs, but there is not a lot on the road to create a berm except wheat he dislodges from the old piles and leaves on my driveway.

Evening brings a magnificent sunset of charcoal colored clouds, glowing where they've been kissed with sunlight. The sky turns crimson and shines down upon the mountains and trees. This gift of nature my blessing for the day.

02242001

Inner Landscapes

Transform yourself
follow inner landscapes
to find the peace within
where all is remembered
glowing with the light of love
and dreams take on form

10191995

A life you love

Find yourself in work
challenge the illusion
and make a life you love

10191995

Not Alone

Your soul will keep
its promise in the end
and take you home
while loved ones weep
you will start again
in heaven you're not alone

10161995

Dance

Dance
dust off
your heart
move along
with life
and love
as it flows
from within

10111995

My journey home

The soul sought the freedom it needed in my forgetting. Peeling away all that held me back, dark passages of sorrow and regret. Unbound now, I prepare for my journey home.

10171995

A calling forth

Call forth the divine within as the strength you need in order to do what you know you must do. Know that what you need already exists within you, and perhaps you simply are not aware of it. Call forth the divine within not so that you can get something, but rather so that you can realize something.

Trust that when you call upon it, it will show up. Call forth the divine not because you don't know what else to do, but rather because you know what to do and need the spiritual strength to do it. Prayer is a calling forth of the divine that results in your mind, body, and spirit being brought into alignment with exactly what you need at any given moment.

10061995

Vanished Somehow

I'm nothing now
not a was, nor will be
ether in a vacuum
a broken vow
a ship lost at sea
gone up in fumes
vanished somehow
along with my memory

12140216

Affirmation of prayer

For many years, my prayers were results orientated. There was something I wanted, and I thought prayer could get it for me when I could not get it for myself. It was later that I realized that prayer is actually an affirmation of what already exists.

Prayer is a demonstration of your willingness to receive what exists as an outgrowth of our faith in the  truth that it is good for us. Prayer is an acknowledgement of our trust in the divine to provide everything we need when we need it.

10051995

Stand Back

I have been rethinking my blessings of this past year, the ending of one chapter in my life, and a whole new world that has been given to me. I have achieved closure in some areas, and a new door has opened to me.

I have been transported from being enclosed to the wide open spaces and the beauty of God's country, nature. I know that God answers our prayers and meets our needs, not in the limited way it is our nature to believe, but in a greater, fuller, richer way than we could imagine possible.

I wanted space and God gave me a home in the mountains with an endless expanse of sky, great forested areas, and a view for miles that is breathtaking. Where I formerly felt suppressed, I now feel serene and expansive.

God wants more for us than we possibly could ask for ourselves. When you ask and pray you'd better stand back, for the answers will come.

03262001

Paving the road

This energy within our souls,
living prayer aligning us with the divine
plugging the void, filling the holes
paving the road to heaven with time

10031995

Me and the Moon

Me and the moon are up early. The cats got me up and it's not quite time for moon to be in bed. I marvel at his perfection in full radiance and the shadows of land masses outlined like an atlas on the surface as he drifts in and out of the clouds lighting them god wherever his illumination touches.

There's a cold breeze blowing and the stars hang in the sky like brilliant polished diamonds. All is peaceful and quiet and nothing seems to stir, but me casting a solitary shadow on my front deck and admiring the white outline of snow below and the trees almost black against the horizon.

Good morning God. One by one a light comes on in scattered houses causing gold lit window shapes seen fractionally through the trees and I know I am no longer the only early riser here on the mountain top.

Good morning world. I wonder if they share my fascination with the night receding and a new dawn breaking. Slowly the outline of homes takes shape as the sky lightens imperceptively in gradients. In the house, I only hear the soft ticking of the clock as the moon disappears from view and the sky lightens.

The snow takes on a blue whiteness, even brightening, and the mountains are seen in greater detail. Welcome to you, oh morning, the coming of a new day. Now there are incoming dark gray clouds that the moon, as it recedes, plays peek-a-boo behind and a touch of pink appearing behind the mountains.

The air so cold you can only stand it for minutes at a time before retreating indoors to unchill again. Now the gray clouds and moon have moved on and in their wake are mountains of green backlit by salmon-colored clouds in a light aqua sky.

Day truly is breaking, the birds have begun to sing in joy, the air is the scent of a morning fireplace to warm the inhabitants of a nearby home, and the squirrels will soon be out in search of breakfast. It's time for me to put the bird feeder out.

As the sky deepens to a darker hue more clouds move in from the north and it seems a new snow storm may quickly be approaching and the temperature seems to have dropped even further. The birds are enjoying their morning seed and I will wait and see what the day holds. Whether it's sun or snow I will live it in joy and conscious awareness, as well as gratitude.

02092001