Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Green Sweater Blues

So came the meeting of two strangers
yet fantastic friends
drawn together thru need
and cause
identifying with ideas
and bending the law
and from them grew need
and from them arose life
separation came
parting hearts, pain, and
hidden tears
friends for a day
stretched across countless
circles chased, circles caught
friends for a day
a time never to be forgotten


Let's share

Will you share the years
of growth, pain, smiles, and tears with me
will you open your heart
and I mine
and share full trust and honesty
will you fall and climb
together with me
you walked into my life
one step at a time
please stay and share
your life and mine


Ceased to be

Ted dreamed one too many a dream. This had become a nightly occurrence, ever since his son's suicide. He had to do something, anything before it was too late. He wasn't very old, fifty two, perhaps. His hair striped black and white, like an old movie's hero. A strong man by nature, yet he couldn't take the pain any longer, he had to do something, he'd dreamed one too many a bad dream.... so Ted ceased to be.


Angels and ghosts

My room is never empty
I've got angels and ghosts
to keep me company


Thorns of dust

A new year comes again
our footsteps do not retrace
an ocean view once shared
a special place
I considered ours, rising into view
enjoyed now alone, no more with you
The rose I sent as a sign of my trust
has withered, its thorns now turned to dust
you need not walk along the water lapping
ripples and soft ocean breeze blowing
or watch the gulls dip and dive... listen
says yesterday, I knew that he was going
it was only my heart that refused the truth of knowing


Monday, December 30, 2013

Get a Life

There are steps and lessons we'd like to skip in life but we were sent here to experience a certain journey and all the events along the way. We can choose to try to drown them, ignore them or refute them but they keep coming up in life's moments calling to us.

Sometimes in small quiet ways, a dream, an intuition, a moment of familiarity in an unknown place. At other times it can be a seismic wake up call telling us to get back on track, there are things to do, and we're wasting time.

We have a purpose to accomplish and it's time we started getting a clue. Remembering who we truly are and who sent us. At times nothing is left but our faith and as we turn to it we know a sense of peace, of spiritual growth, a revelation of life itself.

We can either get it or give up. One path helps us to climb to a higher level. The other commands a repeat performance until we get it right. Warning bells will keep going off trying to wake us to a greater purpose. To consciousness and greater joy for then we know the angels walk with us, guide us, lead us, protect us, and share the experience of life.

They will never leave us for their purpose is to be with us. When we stop struggling and let go and let God we find ourselves in an accelerated world where synchronicity is a common occurrence, where the right people, the right opportunities in the right places, at the right time, magically appear as if they were waiting in the wings for their cue.

The prompting was our new willingness. We experience a greater understanding and appreciation of our life and all life. A greater awareness and recognition. A heightened sense of reality and more blessings than we thought possible. What came before was a preparation. Now we have found the path and our true self. Life is glorious!


Liquid Fire

Remove the pale outer skin
from the heart
and it pulsates red
deep within it
bringing life to all it reaches
giving love as well
with its warm, liquid fire
but the loins
are the furnace of desire


Under the sea

Under the sea
the waves roll over
and oh so gently
crash and roar
right above me


Era of damnation

Two thousand years
and still counting
keeping track
of days and minutes
this era of damnation
surely must end
in salvation


Sunday, December 29, 2013

Until my birthday

It's been a decade since your passing
I nearly forgot, until my birthday
a nice why to remind me, you
dying on that day....


Of life

Split pea soup
coleslaw and apple pie
it's the little things
for which I'm grateful
moments of bliss
a true thanksgiving
of life, of life


I blinked

A new year at midnight
I couldn't keep my eyes open
I blinked and didn't notice
nothing seemed different
nothing had changed
funny thing
this passing of time



Our true gifts
are given
not kept
things we do
for others
as we move
along our way


Saturday, December 28, 2013

Just more empty words

He was no rock
no support either
just empty words
saying things
he thought I wanted
him to say
or me to hear
I waited for the action
for the follow through
it never came
just more empty.... words


A winter's day

Morning tea
some reading
and relaxing
no better way
to start a winter's day


Swallowed by stars

I'm pulled into silence
swallowed by stars
embraced by the universe
folded up by time
dying starts a new journey


Friday, December 27, 2013

Sharing is giving

Sharing is one of the most rewarding experiences we can have. To ourselves and to those we share with. Sharing is not just a giving of an abundance of money. It can be a meal together. Sharing the events of your day. Getting to know someone and sharing the adventures of your life.

It can be experiencing something together: a movie, walk, a day at the beach or shopping. It can be a hobby you have in common with others. It can be a teaching to those who want to learn. Sharing your talent to bring joy into the lives of a few or many. It can be a laugh of mutual humor. You can pray together. Play together.

You can share with a whole group or just one other. But it is an opening up of yourself and taking an interest in others. Sharing is a reward in itself. Some accomplishments we can share long after we are gone, such as: art, music, discoveries and inventions.

Some things we share effect the growth of generations to come. Some sharing can bring devastation to the lives of many, such as unsafe sex causing disease and death. Sharing can be of information you have that can help others.

Sharing can be remembering times past or a hope and goal for the future. Sharing nowadays can be done with unlimited legions on the internet or cyberspace. People even claim to share cybersex. Sharing should be a giving to another of something we value most ourself.

Love tops the list. The angels are always willing to share with us, if we let them. The help us to gain greater spiritual knowledge that we may bring to others. They share our existence in a corresponding plane. They bring synchronicity in our lives, which shares with us what we need to know, when it is appropriate we learn it. Mostly they share God's love with us for it is He that sends them to share this life experience.


Love's no crime

Let's go off some place
just you and I
down the pages of time
we'll smile and cry
lines filling our faces
love's no crime
and needs no reason why....


But for today

For the warmth of you
for the shelter of your arms
my body yearns
to be safe from the storms of life
and shut the world out
from just us two
tomorrow it may be we'll part
but for today... you have my heart


Thursday, December 26, 2013

Cling to hope

We all need to cling to hope in times of helplessness. When we feel a loss of control in our lives. As if we are swimming upstream, against the tide and the debris of a lifetime is not floating past, but is churning forcefully in the waves trying to drown us in despair. To overcome us with its weight, or knock us senseless with its branches.

The purpose is not to become defeated, but to look for that outcropping we can grasp to save ourselves. That hope that is grounded in the spiritual. That seeking of divine intervention that is called faith. That in the right time all will be well. We only need to cling to that single, simple truth that God will see us through all things. That we are never alone. That angels walk with us, and that miracles happen everyday, and that they will happen to you.

Faith can and does move mountains. We are never, ever helpless as long as we reach for spiritual guidance. Look for the opportunity in the smallest grain of sand, the helping hand, each prayer we say and in each new day. Just hang on.

Never let go of that faith. It is your lifeline in the stormy waters of life. Cling to hope. It is your strength in adversity, your support when the bottom falls out, your light in the tunnel and your salvation.

We can also help ourselves by helping others. We are never helpless as long as we can give, even if all we have to give is time. Giving not only helps others, but helps us regain our sense of self. Life isn't futile, it is fruitful. Be not in fear but in faith.

Take pride in accomplishing something daily no matter how small. Each small success we accomplish is a step up out of the flood. Sometimes we need to break away to begin again, and sometimes a storm carries us downstream to do just that.


The setting sun

I watch the setting sun
knowing my race is run
if only I had won


Roses at dusk

Roses at dusk
an unexpected surprise
love at sunset
and fading years ahead
basking in the moment
before it goes away


Still gone

I can almost see your face
through the haze of time
and the days of forgetting
I reach out to touch it
your smile in my tears
knowing you're still gone



My mind and my body
on ten-cent battlefields...
My body is young
and eager for the touch of other bodies.
My mind is old
and quiet
and full of words
that will only mean something


Wednesday, December 25, 2013


If you were my darling
and I your mistletoe
I would hang above your head
and reach to touch you so

or put me in your buttonhole
close upon your chest
and there with you I'll be
to greet each Christmas guest


Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Passing Flury

Snow flakes
melt away
like my memories
soon a blank slate
of nothing today
just a passing flury


Haunting Memory

The departed come back to me
and sit beneath my Christmas tree
this is a holiday of haunting memory


Sit by the sea

Let the world come to me
I'd rather just sit beside the sea
lost in the moment and happy


Christmas Tears

My tears are for Christmas past
things that will never be again
the joy of those days
and memories I thought would last
but all good things do end
and slowly fade away


Give me trees

A tree is gift enough
for me
to watch it grow
year after year
as seasons come
and go
where birds
make home...
yes, give me trees
as far as I can see


I stand in darkness

How can we be lovers
if we aren't even friends?
Relationships develop so fast.
Push, no time for tomorrow.
Accomplish everything today
but wait, please slow down
let me show you what I am,
where I am,
and where I am going.
Look around, reach out,
there's a human being
to be discovered....
I stand in darkness
wondering if
light will ever
come my way again....


Monday, December 23, 2013

Shower upon the earth

Loneliness is
a rainy night
with no one there
to care
that your man
has turned away
and all the clouds
of gray
shower upon the earth
like the tears
that trace down your face
and you're alone
in this lonely place


Another day

I couldn't clean you
out of my veins
such was my addition
blinding and foolish
my love unreturned
drawing me back
for more and more
pushing me to the edge
time after time
nearly insane
until I put you away
drained, but healing
I lived to love
another day


Old Fruit

Looking up
at love's tree
I've never picked
fresh fruit
I've always found mine
on the ground
placed there
by an invisible
sometimes visible
I never particularly
cared for old fruit
it's alright, I guess
but some of the taste
is gone
some of the firmness
is lost
much of it is soiled
as it is handled
by the shoppers
in the market-place-world
of would-be lovers...


Sunday, December 22, 2013

Making Memories

You can't take memories
with you, or keep them
they fade and die
over time, 'tis true
but you can make them
share them, praise them
and spread them
through the winds of time



Renew your dreams
with each rising sun
tear at the seams
pursue folly and fun
shout and scream
your melody must be sung



Our endeavors
rewards in themselves
discovery of who
and what we are
and who we can be
all we have to do
is try....


A journey of dreams

A mile of moonlight
waiting before us
parting the shadows
leading the way
step forward
cast away your fear
discovery awaits
in a journey of dreams



We douse ourselves
in scent, a disguise
to try and cover up
our bullshit
avoiding authenticity
and that which
would set us free


Running Rivers

The source and sound
mixed in blood
running rivers of time
waiting for the aged
to come forward
and set themselves...



The lights go up
red and green
and sparkling colors
in between
the season brings
childlike joy
and songs to sing
the world
our wonderful toy
for a day of love
and peace
blessings from above
let's adorn our tree


Making Music

We were a song
with no chorus
making our own music
until something
went wrong
along the way


Looking out my window

People in windows
somehow seem so
so far away
yet not really
surrounded by their
window frames
hid behind their
window pane
structured shelters
from the rain
they sit within
and I the same
and people's eyes
that they look through
we look through
both me
both you
the grass smells green
the leaves fall brown
the seasons change
the world turns round
and all the while...
while we're looking
through windows


Saturday, December 21, 2013

Two Years Dead

Edna woke to darkness
she'd give Henry her two cents
come the morning light
bills must be paid
to keep the lights on
even if Henry was,
two years dead....


Friday, December 20, 2013

Tomorrow gone

More yesterdays to count
in each aged way
tomorrows are too few
to ponder for long
we're all here today
and tomorrow gone...


to be

How very peaceful it would be
to pretend that you're the sea
How fruitful to be a rose
as your fragrance fills a nose
or to give to any bee
your pollen for honey plentifully.
How gentle to be a breeze
that blows 'ore the seas
that kisses the skin of one so fair
and rustles the leaves of the trees that are there
that whistles through the grass where we lay
making love throughout the day....
but I think I would rather be me
completely filled with your ecstasy.


Saying Sorry

I wish you would stop
saying you're sorry
all the time...
to be with you
... is enough!


Thursday, December 19, 2013

Serpent Queen

Serpent Queen
your blood runs cold
you've used us up
forking out lies
tales of the might have been
stories of the brave and bold
the innocent and corrupt
whisper and cry
there's no Eden to behold
until we're forgiven


Until our reckoning

Naked and in fear
of exposure
of our wicked
until our reckoning


Snow Covered

My snow covered heart
never quite able to thaw
allowing the seeds to start
was my long fatal flaw
after I let love depart...


Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Daughter of the snake

Daughter of the snake
blind and betrayed
to her own mistakes
and the error of her ways



My chains
kept me here
unable to take flight
and soar with you...
with this I must try
and learn to be content


Unwanted roots

Cruel love
grows unwanted roots
a blossom one day
and weeds all the rest


Roads to nowhere

Rip apart the map of years
too many roads filled with tears
too many roads to nowhere


Wild Winds

Let me bring you one last spring
grown with love from seeds sown
oh so long ago, our two hearts one
ours a youthful summer fling
where wild winds did blow
and life was joyous and fun....


Tuesday, December 17, 2013


I used to be drunk with your love
now I just drink...
You used to heat me with your warmth
now I just smoke...
You used to make me feel wanted
now I'm just empty..
I once was whole... untouched
now I'm just a shell...
I was good for you
now I'm just bad for myself
abusing what I am
trying to burn the fire you lit
out... douse the coals...
nothing smoldering...
no candles to light the darkness
my self abuse ...
drives much deeper
than you ever could
although I must admit... you tried
I deny myself... to myself
doubtful of everything
especially... love


Monday, December 16, 2013

There's no oasis

Time a crevice
into which we fall
there's no oasis
just an aging crawl
into the abyss


Empty Pockets

Precious are the coins of time
and yet we spend them unwisely
thinking nothing of losing a dime
our pockets empty so swiftly


Us Left behind

We wander after
that we know won't linger
trying to make sense
of memories once intense
a past left behind
for the fading mind


Splash of color

In a splash of color
the world opened up
reds, greens, and blues too
she'd gotten heaven's favor
an angel's trust
all she dreamed, she could do


Part the clouds

The moon parts a sea of clouds
to light my way through the night
pushing aside my fears and doubts
until I'm at rest at your side....


Happy World

You never gave me anything
real... I could hold onto
like your child...
I would have loved that
something of yours
to take root inside me
deliver me...
of what is left here
nothing... but loving you
milk my breasts dry
they are swollen
from missing your touch
enter me...
and leave the germs
of your tomorrows to grow
within my swollen belly
to be delivered
into tomorrow's happy world


Sunday, December 15, 2013


My cards I meant to send
I worked on them for days
each one filled with fading love
for those so far far away
across the bridge of time when
these holidays we would share
when being together was enough
My cards pile up more and more
with each and every passing occasion
I can't seem to manage time anymore
it's forgetting and not procrastination
that keep my cards from going anywhere


No holiday delights

No more tree
No more lights
No more memories
Nor Silent Nights
Alone and elderly
No holiday delights....


Steam Cleaned

I should be able
to write of happiness
I know I've experienced it
somewhere along the way
I've traveled a long road
I should have bumped into it
here and there...
The moon is happiness to lovers
but cold when you're alone
walking barefoot along the beach
is always better with two
hand in hand...
enjoying the sounds
and smells
and brisk salty air
I've kissed
within the small spaces
allotted to me...
made love between commas
long unhurried times
that left lonely memories
I imagine you making love
to all the others
and happiness disappears
as in a vapor
rising out of sight
I'm steam cleaned of it...


Saturday, December 14, 2013

Anything else...

You're restless as a cougar
ambition must be
your middle name
always searching... for what?
you left me
but refuse to denounce me
searching for my happiness
when only one thing
can make me truly happy
having you...
Why do you give a damn?
are you trying to bullshit me
or do you feel guilty
you took my soul...
what else do you want?


Friday, December 13, 2013

New beginnings

There will be endings in all our lives as each day ends, each month ends, each year too. At times what we need with an ending is closure, and that is more spiritual, more emotional than physical.

To put a chapter of our life behind us so that we may move on. For a new door cannot open until another one closes. As a new month cannot begin until the proceeding one ends.

Sometimes closure is delayed because of legalities, healing, or other obstacles that are blocking our path.Use the time for preparation. For a release of any angers, resentments, emotional pain, and any negativity that will hamper us in a new beginning.

Use the time to study, that you may grow into your new life. See time as an opportunity to expand instead of a barricade to your destiny. There is a purpose to all things. A season for all things under the sun.

The divine knows better what we need in preparation on each leg of your journey than we, ourselves do. Take time to listen to what your spirit is saying.

Remember the hardships and challenges of the past and how you succeeded in overcoming them, how much you grew through them, and how everything has contributed in developing who you are today. And know in your adversity, this too shall pass, the purpose is to grow through life's challenges. The storm that took your home, the tragedy that took a loved one, the circumstances that cost you your livelihood.

There is a "something more" to gain from the experience and oftentimes we are impressed by the courage exhibited in such times of trail. The reaching out to others, encouraging the downtrodden. I look around and wouldn't wish anyone's life by my own, for I know the diving has designed this path just for me that there are things to accomplish only I can fulfill.

Bless this path, its endings and new beginnings.


the other part

I can live without
someone I love
but not without someone
I need....
that kindred soul
that's the other part
of me...



Like overdue library books,
some people stay on my mind...
like a junkie, I'm hooked
on love, on life, sadly blind...


Something to remember

I'm not looking for answers anymore,
but for something to remember...
something solid, a tangible reward
to take with me to the ever after...


I remember shadows

So many years have climbed over me
since you've gone away
a lifetime in a day
and the years were ones of blossoming for me.

How sad to know
I could not bloom for you.
To know how late I was in finding you.
You were afraid of love already by then.

Now, when I think of you,
I remember shadows
and how kind we thought the world
not to light our secret place.
Sad, too,
to find that feeling gone.
Just when I'm strong enough to keep it.



If you loved.... if it was love
on your part
it's doubtful
balm to soothe your wounds
like an animal
to help you heal your past hurts
Lust... curiosity
an ego trip out of control
probably much closer to the truth
all I've accused myself of
for what?
It doesn't matter...
Nothing really did to you
so why should I establish
any importance to it
accredit it with any reality
nothing given
leaves what?... Nothing!
gone with the evidence
that I was ever there
I took it all with me
you left nothing
for me to return... not even love


Thursday, December 12, 2013

No Dancing

I wish I'd been younger
and hadn't seen
or known so much
then maybe...
I would dance
with innocent believing
I was never young....



The demons
of lost love
still haunt me
like bad dreams
that never end
an endless sea
filled with tears
and a heart
that can't mend


The Sad Celebration

I've been broken before,
I know what it's like
to see something funny
and not laugh.
I often wished I had never smiled.
Knowing how to
and not being able to
is worse than never knowing.

Sometimes, when I see a child walking,
I can come home faster to my own.
It's because they are clean
and they have hope.
The make me believe in something.

But when there is nothing alive in me at all,
when I've been battered down
with voices,
or the sound of them,
when I have to let go
of someone or something,
when I have to say goodbye
to anything
that's when I know what it's like
to see something funny
and not laugh....


Corrupted by a smile

I thought I was above love
couldn't be conquered by man
but was corrupted by a smile
and warm laughing eyes....
Your mouth engorged me
with the fullness of you
leaving me dangling
from your teeth...
The wanting of you has
eroded me from inside out
leaving a hallow case
to be filled with flowers
and laid to rest...
Breasts rose scented
from the petals I've eaten
I'm searching for a new soul
to fill what is left
to inhabit this much used body
I began and ended
with the love the conqueror
used... emptiness
his only conquest
not much to show for the trip
was it worth it?


Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Drift Away

A saxaphone
softly pays
for those alone
letting love drift away


Joyous Lute

Heart strings
like a lute
so we can
dance together
as one....


Always with me

Some days I can't get past the tears of your memory
you, taken away from the world oh so quickly
are here always, and forever, with me....


Filling Blank Pages

I've stitched myself
back together carefully
the thread shows
here and there
but will fall off
when the scars heal
I hide myself
behind sunglasses
dry eyed
wrung out... from weeping
I've folded up
all the corners
that were vulnerable
and cut the edges
I'm like a carbonated soda
with the fizz gone
Someone put my fire out
and now I stand in darkness
many blank pages
of could have beens
left unwritten
I peel off skin
to write on
pale pink... raw
with feeling


Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Waiting for nothing

Waiting was hard
but forgetting more so
in an unyielding world
for love to return
for dreams to come true
before being swept away
with age, in time....


Warm Sand

My mind so clear
I can close my eyes and see
all the days and nights
of you and me...
I remember the warmth of the sun
the feel of the sand
the sound of the surf
and the touch of your hand
my memories now are all I have
now you are gone from me
so I return to our beach
and listen to the crashing sound of the sea
and with the world shut out
I can still picture in my mind
your happy smile there that day
and some solace then I find
I know if my memory forever were to be lost
of the sea, the rain, the dew
the sun and warmth of the sand
I would still remember you....


The visual effect

I would want to change myself
I've never been happy
with the total sum of me
I keep trying to rearrange
the visual effect that I have
It's easier to redo your hair color
than to stretch your body
I find...
The only thing I would keep
just the same
is my tongue
I find I like my tongue
just as it is
It's the only thing that feels
sensual... about me


Monday, December 9, 2013

Life changing attitude

God has put in my life what I need to grow and learn. The message is a change of life attitude. Faith not fear. To release the blocks of the past. To be grateful each day for the many blessings in my life. To take time to pray, meditate, listen, and learn.

Synchronicity is a great part of my life. A teacher has appeared when a lesson has needed to be learned. Books, prayers, and a sense of peace have come when most needed. Even laughter when it has been lacking has been provided so that I don't take everything so seriously, but see the lighter side of life.

When I start feeling down I only need remember what life was like before and I feel blessed. No, I don't know all the answers, but I am willing to learn the lessons God knows I need to move on into the next state of my life. To put my personal world in order.

Chaos does not serve right living or honor our spirit. Some lessons I am slower at accepting thus my progress is delayed until I am ready to move on. When I am in limbo I need ask myself what I need to learn and accept at this stage.

Where am I floundering and not listening? For the message is always there waiting for us to acknowledge it. God is ever so patient with us, His children. His love is unconditional.

My journey has been a long one and I could have moved ahead ages ago, but I didn't understand He was waiting for me to ask. I am guided, not led. The choice is up to me to ask, to accept, to seek, to listen, to experience, and to prepared.

God provides what we need when we need it. But He does not force us to accept. I feel as if I were blind but gradually I am able to see more clearly, more consciously and more gratefully. God does provide abundantly. It is we who block the way, restricting our own life. When we believe we are open to receive and all things are possible.



This dimension
old age...
twilight years
of confusion
has but one
all the love
and joy
until the end


Running out of words

I'm running out of words
names for these fading things
of thinning memory
uncounted days passing by
they used to matter to me
once... long ago



I don't plan to pass
this way again
a world too crass
games of lose or win
just won't last
such shallow sins
in which we invest
never seem to end


Eroding us away

I have not found
anyone absolutely content
with their lives,
or their looks,
or themselves...
They envy others
for their bone structure
or their wild
flowing hair...
There's always nagging
life's discontentments
eroding us away
into shadows
of what we could be


Sunday, December 8, 2013

Fading Stars

You are fading
with yesterday
but then you
were always
going from me
like daylight
into evening....
pale remembrances
of days gone by...
nothing of myself
is left
gone with the night
like the stars
when the morning arrives


Saturday, December 7, 2013

Seeing Snow

I forget the fist time I saw snow,
and yet I still feel it in my bones...
winter has become part of me now
my season of life too, mine alone
all this nature does bestow...



Show me evidence
that you were here
my body disbelieves it
only my dreams
bring it all back
but in faded shadows
without reality
your semen,
your warmth,
your filling of me,
eyeless witness
without tongues
have nothing to say
gone with yesterdays
fading daylight
nothing reproduced
on the canvas of me
an invention of my
without renewal
dreams are not evidence


Friday, December 6, 2013

My moonshine

My moonshine
made from muddy
waters of love
flowing to the coastline
rampant and bloody
there's no salvation from above
no walk in the sunshine
so unlike the stills of Kentucky
you won't be abuzz
singing of your Clementine
drinking these spirits of the unlucky
no, but you might combust...



Wounds of the soul
don't heal with time
they steal our life away


Here we are

The neon blared out
here we are, waiting
the lonely and desperate
we the cheated
and brokenhearted
dying, not living
in a wasteland of life
just a long never ending
and empty night


Just Marking Time

Every day
is a waiting period
I'm just marking time
ripping them off
like used calendar pages
I got through another one
so what?
This isn't living
it's like hell on earth
I felt like a woman once
my breasts bare
hugging the see thru blouses
my nipples hard for you
spraying perfume
anywhere you might touch
yesterday's rainbow has gone
now it just pours
so what?
who in the hell cares?
do you...


Thursday, December 5, 2013

at long last

I was an angel
who took the wrong path
sitting in hell
repenting my past
heaven beheld
at long last


Under a spell

I fell under
the spell
of my dreams
blind to the lies
and the schemes
that turned
my life to hell


Singing Star

I have loved you after
time ran out
on both your watch and mine
until my body
was a single singing star


Landing Safely

I have no luck
with men at all
always landing on
barren deserts
with no vegetation
to nourish me...
Their feelings
are mapped out
than women's
all exterior surface
like their bodies
I keep all that I am
inside... being woman
a soft mattress
to lay on
falling with all
the weight of you
onto me
landing safely...


Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Adrift in limbo

This is what limbo is like, holding your breath and waiting for something to happen. Closure, a new beginning, an ending to an old chapter, waiting, just waiting.

You observe life going on all around you. Watching, waiting, in stagnation. Lost, adrift, abandoned, left to rot, or sink without a trace.

A boat on a sea of turmoil with no sails....


Waiting Wings

Death will visit
in mercy
a delivering angel
with waiting wings....



I must confess
that I have not yet
learned to understand you
I would like to
climb inside and see
just what makes you tick
you're everywhere
or is it just my imagination
someone is always
mentioning your name
or something about you
I think I could move
out of the country even
and someone would ask
about you... "have you seen"
I'm either going to get
over loving you
or win you one of these days
like a Crackerjack prize
Did you see what I found
in my box!!!
bingo... I win


Youthful Folly

Love my youthful folly
carried me on its wings
I couldn't help but sing
when I fell from on high
still, I wasn't sorry
even through the tears
I cried....
I remember it fondly
year after year....


Whirlwind of turmoil

Today is one of havoc
and mental confusion
rush... rush... rush...
How easily others seem
to lead their calm lives
The have money
husbands who care,
I'm a whirlwind
of turmoil
in comparison
caught in the
incurable disease
of love's crutches...
Dear Doctor
can you cure
this illness?...
You ignore my
by your own choice
and the disease


Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Rattling Bones

The world a shallow grave
just deep enough
to bury our dreams,
but still expose our mistakes...
rattling bones
of deeds gone wrong....


World on a shelf

I deceived myself
dreaming dreams
that would never be
my world on a shelf
wasting my springs
never truly free


More Still

I'm lessor now
because you're gone
but more still
because you were here


just waiting

I am bored
with what I am
locked up everything
that I ever was before
taking my daily pill
waiting for my cycle
that is part of the woman
I am... you knew


Monday, December 2, 2013

Life is like the sea

Life's trails are like sea shells on the beach you come upon them one at a time. The are all different indesign and color and you often wonder what brought them to where they are.

If you put them to your ear you can hear the peace of the ocean. And if we listen in life we can hear the still small voice in our ear that tells us "everything will be okay".

That is our guardian angel speaking to us. Life like the ocean has its ebbs and flows. Nothing is constant except the divine. He is always with us, steadying us in our faith, guiding us with His eternal light, and comforting us with His endless love.

Like the sea we all have our stormy times. And times of calm and peacefulness. Each day the sun rises and the sun sets and if we bother to notice we find each one unique and magnificent.

Driftwood is like some of us gliding through life without true consciousness and washing up on shore unsure of what brought us there.

Sometimes life is a tangle like the seaweed that wraps itself around whatever it encounters. Life like the sea is full of hidden dangers, drop offs, and debris. Be aware on your journey, seek guidance of the divine.

Rid yourself of the excess baggage of hidden anger, fear, prejudice, hatred, and all negativity which are pollutants to the spirit. Much rainfall, runoff, drainage, and others sources finds its way into our seas.

Be careful of what you allow into the environment to be washed away as well as what you expose yourself to in life. Be of good company. Do not enter where your angels will not go.

Do not expose yourself to the sickness of evil or violence. Clean your beaches and your heart that they may both be pure. All things are divine gifts to be treated with respect and gratitude that they my thrive.


Be an example in life

God gave us words that we may communicate. God gave us truths that we may believe. God gave us His only son that we may be saved.

God, our Father, loves us more than we could ever imagine. God gave us life that we may experience and remember. That we may love and share. That we may serve and find purpose.

For this is our journey and we touch the lives of those we pass along the way. Be an example of God's love in your sharing, giving, loving, and in your faith.

We teach most, not with words but by example. Be an example of love in action. When you see someone in need, don't close your eyes and pass by. What would Jesus do?

Do what is necessary and do it with heartfelt love. For whatever you do for the least of my brothers you do for me. So said Jesus.

This life is not about who accumulates the most things, although possessions themselves are not evil. God wants us to have abundance, but not as our sole purpose in life.

We are here to learn, to teach, to remember and to exhibit the love of God that we have been blessed with. God will show us the way if we let him.

Pray for guidance, for insight, for strength through trails and faith that all will be well. We cannot always see the purpose behind events as they happen.

Look for the lesson in all things. Be open to hear, to know a greater intent than what is happening in the moment. Be at peace knowing God will show you the way.

He sends angels to guide you. To whisper in your ear. To protect you in times of danger, and to offer you unconditional love.

We are never alone on this journey of life for we are accompanied always by heavenly hosts. Seek divine guidance and rightful living. Communication through daily prayer. Unwavering faith. And always as a child of God by example.


Cracked Plaster

Many people
surrounded me
making bets if I would last
I'm made of durable material
I'll outlast them all...
I've had my sex life opened up for analysis
They've openly discussed
my choice of lovers
muttering what a mess
I've made of myself...
My world has crashed in
on the head of everything
The plaster has cracked
but I'm still here
I've accused myself,
tried myself
and judged myself
more guilty
then they ever would have
and sentenced myself
to crippled writings
people with ghosts
of yesterdays...


Awaken the waters

The earth is hard
but the sand is not
the early morning sunrise
born from the sea
bears its reddening fruit
across the horizon
of the oceans
slowly turning the dawn
red as with blood
in translucent light
stained with the fruit
of ripened berries
the fingers of it spreading
to walk the lightening day
blossoming forth
Christmas aglitter
in the sky
like stained glass windows
to awaken the waters
of a new day


Sunday, December 1, 2013

My road home

My wounds
My mind
Eternity awaits
outside of time
my road home


My Athena

I wake
calling out
"Athena, Athena"
are you still there?
Darkness fills the room
with deafening silence
and fear....
I cry out in panic
could my guardian angel
truly be gone?
Awake my child
is all I hear....
My nightmare over
my Athena near....


With you

With you I felt
so warm...
and satisfied...
and happy...
it was oh so lovely
the times we had...
and I wouldn't change one thing
not one...
the walk along the beach
the touch of you
it was all so perfect
just as I think you are...